Saving Your Marriage - The Role of Forgiveness

Should you be willing to forgive your cheating spouse if they seek your forgiveness, after indulging in an affair? You should, in the interest of saving your marriage. I know it is not easy.

 

If you have been the victim of an affair, you will be in a state of turbulence. On the one hand, you have been hurt by your spouse's seeking lovinga.com review the love of another person. You may not just be hurt but be feeling angry, let down and depressed as well. The realization that your spouse had deserted you, even if it was only for a short period, will cause so much pain that it will normally take a long time for it to subside.

 

On the other hand, you may also be keen on saving your marriage if you are convinced that the affair was only an aberration and not an act of betrayal by your spouse. So, if your spouse asks for forgiveness, you should only be too glad to forgive them. But your negative emotions will keep you from deciding in favor of forgiving the erred spouse.

 


Evaluating the request for forgiveness by asking the following questions and getting answers to them will enable you to decide lovinga.com  whether you should forgive your spouse, in the interest of saving your marriage.

 

1) Is your spouse remorseful of their action?

Seeking forgiveness by your spouse might not necessarily have stemmed from their realizing their wrongdoing and feeling remorseful about it. They may be seeking forgiveness because they have no other option at the particular moment. They may not yet be ready for breaking away from you. They may just be biding for time. Forgiving your spouse in such cases will be nothing short of foolishness. But how to judge whether your spouse is genuinely contrite? You should be able to find this out by asking a few searching questions.

 

2) If forgiving requires that you make some changes in your behavior, are you ready to make these changes?

it is quite possible that certain commissions and omissions on your part had contributed to the occurrence of the affair. In such a case, you may have to make some changes on your part. There may not be an express demand for these changes from your spouse given their sense lovinga of guilt. But such changes will definitely be required, since any problem will remain unresolved unless the factors causing the problem are dealt with. If you are contemplating forgiveness, you should ask yourself whether you will be comfortable with making these changes.

 

3) Will you be happy after forgiving your spouse?

The very idea of forgiving a cheating spouse is to save the marriage and put the relationship back on the rails. Ask yourself whether you are confident of this happening. If you have doubts on this objective being fulfilled, you may have to consider whether it will be better to end the relationship rather than forgive your cheating spouse and prolong the agony.

 

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